Her mood : Feeling Hot!!
Yes, i feel so hot... wahahaha... not me, not me.. it is the weather!!

Mr. Sunshine, i do love you, i really do.. but it is time that you should go. It's nothing personal. It's just me. I can't take the heat anymore... You're killing me!!!

LoL...

I admit, I sux at planning. All my plans always end up ugly. I wonder why people still have faith in me. If i'm Wonderfully Superbly Good Planner, the outing to Pavilion, KL wouldn't end up with only...

... both of us??

Rebecca and I ^^ ignore the cleaner, she's talking to the wall.. Ehh???

It's just always both of us. Rebecca, please stop asking me to ruin our wonderful outing. I'm hopeless. pfft!!

You wanna push up my spectacles, right??

I'm thinking whether to start wearing contact lenses again. I really do hope that my mommie owns a printing money machine, you know!!??

College today was interesting.

Met the weirdest girl in my course. She sat beside me. Everyone else started to leave. She is well-known for her weirder-ness. Even, Rebecca!! I said.. NO NO.. YOU SIT!! DON'T LEAVE!! Rebecca gave an evil smile and left.. Thanks so much, girl!! Yay, talk about having each others' backs. Bluek!!

She, WeirdGirl kept talking and talking. I kept looking elsewhere and NOT HER. To me, she is always like a music box. You put her in a box and when you open it, she will come out and talk and talk without knowing her limit.

W. Girl : Hello, Kimberly.... I miss you
Kimmy : ehehe.. hehe.. err..
W. Girl : You know, (she starts)... i'm not good. Year 3 is suffering... yada yada yada.. (kimmy yawns LOUDLY, looked elsewhere, entertained my phone ..WeirdGirl still talking..) and my dessertation... i'm afraid i can't do. And my assignment is about company's ethics, can you help me think of one?? I can't think of any.. it is so difficult. I am so scared. you know, like pollute the environment, marine life. yada yada yada...yea, I'm waiting for my class. (Kimmy: did i even asked?) And... you know my lecturer, Ms X, i don't know whether she is teaching me. I hope she is teaching me but then i am afraid i can't understand. You know, my Principles of Marketing, i failed the midterm. And, my boyfriend *yes, she HAVE a BF* said that i'm good at Marketing and not Finance. YOU must have the interest if not you cannot do the assignment. How are you going to do the assignment when you are not interested in the subject?? Next time come out and work, it will be difficult. *YAWN EVEN LOUDER, she still didn't get it* Haha.. DO you have a boyfriend, Kimberly????
Kimmy : (my eyes wide opened!!) Err, do i look like i have a BF?? What makes you think I DESERVED one?? *rendah diri, wei!!*
W. Girl : Your complexion so nice. Look at my face! Dot here and there. (frankly, her complexion is so much better).
Kimmy : Waa, you think just because of my complexion i have a BF??
W. Girl : And, your body nicer...
Kimmy : What??!!! *that sound so lesby... used my handbag to cover my body, even though i know that i'm fully dressed...
W. Girl : From the last last time i've seen you, you are so much much better than last time...
Kimmy : Oh, thank you but if you really want to know, I do not have a BF.
W. Girl : WHAT!!?? Still don't have a boyfriend!!
Kimmy : *wth!!* err.. no, i'm not as lucky as you. *fake smile*
W. Girl : Aiya, you think got BF very nice ah?? My BF and i got a lot of problems.. And there she goes again...... His mom very conservative, my dad asked me to be respectful. I asked him to go for my CG's Ball cuz I want him to go with me. Which girl don't wanna have a date, right?? Then i took him to this seminar on what is love. How to show love. Not sex la, yada yada..
Kimmy: *i interrupted* How to show love??
W. Girl : *she didn't answer my question* He very stupid 1. Don't know how to show love to me. You know, in the year 2005, i forced him to give me flowers on Valentine's Day. He don't want actually but I must force him. I also forced him to buy me flowers in the year 2006. After he attend the seminar i asked him to, in the year 2007, he automatically gave me flowers.
Kimmy : Maybe because you forced him for the last two years?? sarcastic, eh??
W. Girl : Must force. Which girl don't want flowers on V-Day? I will be very jealous, you know.
Kimmy :err.. err... *i need to escape from this conversation* i think your class starts already. BYE BYE..

and i ran away. literally.

met up with another normal friend today. JY.

JY : Kim, i can't recognise you today. you look different. Like you have a glow in you.

... my mood swings easily. really. i'm more than complicated ...

i'm the reason for the word complicated


all smiling look
another sec, all emo look

and the next sec...all sakai look

God is Love. He always gives me the fatherly feeling. Just like how my daddie treat her little girl. If i be good, daddie will plant me with a kiss and a hug. In contrast, if I disobey my earth Dad, the One up there will also show the same black face. I've learned to obey. If I obey and leave everything unto Him, everything will be according to His plans. Whether the plans are the ones that you like or dislike, i understand that He knows what is best for me. Do you think that He likes letting us go through those hardship? He wepts when those problems hurts us so. Only He knows what is best for us. He made us so that He can Love us. How much more can I ask for?

I've my own complications. i Feel that i'm a hipocrite lately. I dislike someone lately. I feel that this someone is a faker. I feel that this someone dislikes me and chose to be fake around me. This someone made me feel fugly. yes. FUGLY. that is worse than UGLY. I feel so down when i'm with this person. I don't even wanna hang around with this person. Mood Spoiler!!!!!!!

but, who am i to judge others when God judges us??

Love others, i remembered.

So, what can i do?? I tried my best to not dislike this person. but, it turns out to be more of like an act i am pressured to put up. I ended up feeling like a hypocrite. People said that i think too much. I wanted to believe that, but my instinct tells me a different thing. I am torned between my instinct and my rationality.

I am so tired of dancing around the fire.

Do you have the feeling that you should just follow you heart. Do what you feel comfortable. And never regret.

I regretted.

I followed my heart and now, i ended feeling more of an idiot and a fool every single day.

Who am i to kid?? My nature kills me. What the heck??
Why still those butterflies in me?

Is there anyway where i can just be myself and not be judged?

Myself??


Passport picture

Don't look at me-lah.

-sweat it out, kim-